Sexuality: How Young Is Too Young?

I was asked by someone (who will not be identified) an interesting and difficult question. It's something tricky that I never even thought seriously about until it was mentioned, although I was expecting someone to ask eventually.

The question is this: when is it appropriate for young girls to dress to be sexy?

This issue is incredibly easy to trip over your own feet with. It's completely a matter of taste. It depends on the girl's parents and how comfortable they are with it, along with how much control they want to have over their child. I know some parents that wouldn't even let their kid wear short shorts until she's at least 17, and some that will let their 9-year-old wear a crop top.

It was pointed out that girls dressing in revealing clothing probably aren't aware that they're dressing in a provocative manner. Note that at the age I'm thinking about, 5-10, most kids don't know a whole lot about sex. The only reason we see it as dressing "sexy" is because we associate the clothes they're wearing with sexuality, whether kids have any concept of sexuality or not.

Girls could also feel the need to dress that way because they're influenced by what they see in the media. I've noticed a lot of parents are making this out to be some sort of epidemic. I mean you don't have to look far to see partial nudity. Turn on Much Music for ten minutes and you will see tummies and arms and cleavage and legs all over the place.

I can see how girls might end up looking up to these people and seeing them as role models. I agree that this is problematic, for sure, but I believe the parents are mostly responsible for this. If you don't want your kid exposed to sexuality at an early age, just turn the TV off and monitor their friends. You know, be a parent!

Those TVs suck kids right in

Some parents don't really care, though. And then you have moms like in Toddlers And Tiaras. Oh, yay! Time for a rant!

Toddlers and Tiaras is just gross. I think we can all agree with this. Pageants alone are bad enough (any beauty contest just makes me want to throw up), but dressing 4-year-olds up in sexy outfits and pretty much making them look like hookers? And for what? So the mom can win a trophy and some money? And at what cost!? Any number of things can happen to these kids because of the treatment they get. Most turn into spoiled brats and it's worrying that they may grow up to see themselves as a sexual object.

Me too

There's a difference between dressing sexy because you feel comfortable doing it and dressing sexy because you legitimately feel worthless if you don't. Shows like Toddlers and Tiaras can very easily cause this to happen to those little girls 10 years from now. I mean just look at how the mothers treat them when they don't do everything perfectly. They yell at their children (which borders on verbal abuse) and start getting the gym teacher mentality. Do I need to explain what this does to a person's self-esteem?

Barbies and Tiaras

What's even more unfortunate is that most of the girls on the show are too young to understand why what their parents are making them do will be harmful to them in the long run. Actually, most kids, pageants or no pageants, have any idea what the ramifications of their actions are. 90% of the time, they have no idea what they're doing.

This entry is getting long, so I'll try to wrap it up. I think if it's okay with the parents that a girl is dressing provocatively, and that it's obvious that the child legitimately wants to dress that way because they want to, then that's up to them. However, if it's broadcast on television (as in exploitation), then we have a problem. We can't really control what people do in their private lives anyway. The shift in how we see people who wear revealing clothes also needs to happen in order for it to be a little more acceptable for younger girls to dress how they want.

Like I said, this is a tricky subject. Besides, the majority of younger girls I see don't really wear sexy clothes. I see it most in the summer, which is perfectly understandable. It's better to have everything out than to slowly bake in your clothes just because of other people.

I say it's appropriate to dress sexy whenever the parents deem it to be, and/or whenever the child is ready. I don't think we really have a say in how this happens anyway. I think as long as they're happy and still get to be kids, it's all right with me!

- Carli_V